IMPORTANT NOTE
A lawyer returns to his parked BMW to find the headlights broken and considerable damage to the bonnet. There's no sign of the offending vehicle but he's relieved to see that there's a note stuck under the windshield wiper.
"Sorry. I just backed into your Beemer. The witnesses who saw the accident are nodding and smiling at me because they think I'm leaving my name, address and other important information.
But I'm not."
Buh Bye!
===================================== School boy to teacher:
"I did my homework, but the dog pressed control-alt-delete!"
================================== The air turns cool, the leaves turn brown, a change is taking place. And everywhere the signs appear... of Fall's approaching face.
The birds begin their southward flight that takes them far away. And in their plaintive song and cry... a fond good-bye they say.
A season dies, a new one's born, like night gives way to day. Such is the wondrous work of God... in His own chosen way.
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Hiking In The Woods... Three men are hiking through the woods, and they come to a raging river. The water is so deep and so fast that it seems impossible to cross. The first man offers a prayer, "Please, Lord, give me the strength to cross this river." The Lord decides that this is a reasonable request. A cloud settles over the man, and when it lifts, he is taller, with legs like tree trunks and massive arms. He struggles to cross the river, and after 4 hours, he makes it.
The second man offers a prayer, "Please, Lord, give me the strength and ability to cross this river." The Lord decides this is a reasonable request; a cloud settles over the man, and when it lifts, he has massive arms, and there is a rowboat next to him. He struggles across the river, and after 3 hours, he makes it across.
The third man offers a prayer, "Please, Lord, give me the strength, ability and wisdom to cross this river." The Lord decides this is a reasonable request; a cloud settles around the man, and when it lifts, he has been changed into a woman. She looks at a map, walks 100 yards downstream, and crosses the bridge!!
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REMEMBER to make a wish before you read the poem. (Did you make a wish?) If you don't make a wish, it won't come true. Last Chance to Make a Wish.
May today there be peace within.
May you trust your highest power that you are exactly where you are meant to be....
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you....
May you be content knowing you are a child of God....
Let this presence settle into our bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of you....
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A little girl was sitting with her grandfather as he read her a bedtime story. From time to time she would take her eyes off the book and reach up to touch his wrinkled cheek. She'd then touch her cheek, then touch his again.
Finally she spoke up, "Grandpa, did God make you?" "Yes, sweetheart," he answered. "God made me a long time ago."
"Oh," she paused. "Grandpa, did God make me too?" "Yes indeed, honey," he said. "God made you just a little while ago."
Feeling their respective faces again, she observed, "God's getting better at it, isn't he?"
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You can find peace in the eyes of the Lord By believing in Him and trusting His Word
Cast all your cares on Him whose love
Was given to us from Heaven above.
His truth will last forever more
He'll guide our steps to Heavens door.
We will see His face and hold His Hand
When we go with Him to the Promised Land.
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GOD'S ALPHABET
Although things are not perfect, Because of trial or pain, Continue in thanksgiving, Do not begin to blame. Even when the times are hard, Fierce winds are bound to blow, God is forever able, Hold on to what you know. Imagine life without His love, Joy would cease to be. Keep thanking Him for all the things, Love imparts to thee. Move out of "Camp Complaining," No weapon that is known, On earth can yield the power, Praise can do alone. Quit looking at the future, Redeem the time at hand. Start every day with worship, To "thank" is a command. Until we see Him coming, V ictorious in the sky, We'll run the race with gratitude, Xalting God most high. Yes, there'll be good times and yes some will be bad but, Zion waits in glory, where none are ever sad! "
I AM Too Blessed to be Stressed!"
The shortest distance between a problem and a solution is the distance between your knees and the floor.
The one who kneels to the Lord can stand up to anything.
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