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Help, scared & wondering what to do

  Author: 59828  Category:(General Advice) Created:(7/26/2002 9:28:00 PM)
This post has been Viewed (243 times)

Here's the jist of my problem, I really like a girl from the church I go to, but I'm literally scared out of my mind to ask her out. Ok, a little background on why I'm scared to do this: #1 the last girl I dated from there dumped me because I have health problems, and #2 the girl I've recently been dating there (who I am no longer seeing) really kind of turned me off to asking out any girls from there again.

So here's my dilemma:

Why is it I'm having such a hard time getting up the nerve to ask the new girl out? Ok, so I'm short on funds, but that's never stopped me before. I know it's not guilt from breaking it off with the previous one that's doing it (her mom caused that break up), and I didn't think I was scared to do it ......then I started thinking about it, and got really freaked out about it.

I dunno, I'm just having more trouble getting up the nerve to call her up. Maybe this is my way of telling myself I'm not ready to date some one yet? Or maybe I'm just trying to find a way to talk myself out of asking her out. I've never waited this long on this kind of thing before. I must be sick or something.....maybe even losing my edge for all I know. Most aggravating.

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Replies:      
Date: 7/26/2002 9:36:00 PM  From Authorid: 53427    You must really like her to let it bother you this much. Just ask her and get it over with. Good luck!  
Date: 7/26/2002 9:37:00 PM  From Authorid: 53427    The worst she can do is say no. Right?  
Date: 7/26/2002 9:40:00 PM  From Authorid: 55330    awww thats cute! hehe u look 4 girls @ church, huh?! -net-  
Date: 7/26/2002 9:41:00 PM  From Authorid: 59248    well, here's my two Cents. Ok, I wouldn't like to really date anyone from my church because you Know what they believe, and religious conversations are pretty neat (for me anyways) and there's probably a fear of insulting each other, since you each know what the other is SUPPOSED to believe. Another thing, I faced serious Fears of Rejection as well, and as you can find in my long post: "Friends to more than such..." (read that one) most people said that fear of rejection is no reason not to ask someone, and I asked a gal out before I even knew of USM, and even though I got shot down, I felt better just knowing that I finally managed to get up the Courage to do such a thing!! so go for it, and if you get shot down, you at least know that you got over a fear, a wonderful personal accomplishment -Contena -Message me to discuss anything further.
Date: 7/26/2002 10:06:00 PM  From Authorid: 59833    Try dating someone Out of church. Maybe This girl you are wanting to ask out isnt the right one anyways
Date: 7/27/2002 5:39:00 AM  From Authorid: 58051    get over it and just ask someone  
Date: 7/27/2002 1:39:00 PM  From Authorid: 59876    hi there,

i think church is the perfect place to meet a girl. what would be better, a bar? a rave? by meeting a girl at church, chances are you will have alot in common and there would be less stife in your relationship if it worked out because you wouldn't have big separating issues between you. differences in religion, race, morals, allthese things have been proven to add additional stress to relationships and marriages. nobody could say what will work out and what won't and you won't know unless you try. please try sweetie, take that step. when my husband and i were introduced to each other we were both so shy that our eyes didn't meet. now we have been together for 11 years and have a son. if she did say no, it would hurt. yes, your ears will burn. but, a year from now that person could be a distant memory to where your life is at that point. try it. :)
  
Date: 3/11/2003 8:03:00 PM  From Authorid: 18516    It's just nerves..your back into the dating world so of course your going to be nervous..just go up to her and ask.  

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